Rants from a Cynical Raven











Hey there everyone!! So, new month, new entry, new stuff!!!!!

I am finally getting off of my ass and re-applying to college for the Fall Semester!! I’ve registered to be a full time student and I’m going to be working as well!! Of course even this simple task wasn’t had with out difficulties. So the college I’m going to set my registration date for August 6th……classes start the 23rd….so you can see how I was feeling like I was under a time crunch and freaking out a little. So I’m at work on the 6th waiting for my time to come up and trying to help customers at the same time. Luckily my co-worker, we’ll call him “Fry”, was there to take most of the customers while I registered. Everything’s ok, right? NOPE!! NEVER IS!! XD!! So I register and suddenly the page tells me that I can’t register cause I don’t have the proper “HS form” ……………………………………..FFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!……..What the hell is an “HS form”??!?!?! So I call Admissions & Records to find out…………………..they’re closed on Fridays…..won’t be open till Monday……FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!! So all weekend I’m spazing out, I NEED these classes to keep my insurance!! So this morning I called them up and asked them what the hell an HS form is, she says that it’s a form I need to fill out for graduating High School. I asked her why I needed to fill that out again, she says “Well did you just graduate?” I said “No, I graduated 7 years ago…and filled out the HS Form 7 years ago…” she says “…………………………………………………….oh” =D So even though they fucked up and their computers screwed me over they’re not doing anything about it. I’m now registered for 1 class, and wait-listed for 3 more……joy…

In other news!!! THE D’ESPAIRSRAY CONCERT WAS AMAZING!!!! WOHFAKDJGSLJDGALJORIEHOIERNGL!! I was right in front with some of my buddies!! They have so much freaking energy and the entire time I was moving, jumping, singing, screaming, I was covered in sweat by the end of the show!! I got to touch ZERO’s bass and Dr. Sweet had a “bro hand grab” with Hizumi. I met some super amazing people in line, and I’ve become friends with them and I’m excited to have some new people in my life to share JRock with ❤ So while we’re in line (we’d been there since about 4 in the morning) tour buses started showing up and taking pictures and video of all of us…like we were animals in a zoo. It was really annoying and by that afternoon I was so done with it all. I swore that the next tour bus that came by I was going to chase it down like the wild animal that they thought I was……..lucky for you my friend had the camera rolling:

I’m also going to the Dir en grey concert in September, hope to see you there!!!

So August 18th is my birthday, ya’ll!! I am apparently going to 2 different parties for this and my family wants a third for themselves to celebrate with me XDD I’m super excited and just not sure what to think of it all XDDD College, friends, concerts, this is the best birthday month so far, EVER!! I can’t wait to share my excitement with everyone ^^ TIL NEXT TIME!



backstabber!!!It’s recently come to my attention that certain members of my “friends” have been talking about me in a most unpleasant manner. To be very honest I don’t care all that much, they’ve been spreading rumors about me and calling me things that have the words “emo” and “fat” in the same phrase. I’m not too surprised about one of them, they’ve done nothing but rag on me the entire time I’ve known them and honestly I’m done with it all. I don’t need that kind of drama and I’m just going to be the bigger person and walk away. The others I am a little surprised only because they’ve been listening to this person and agreeing with them. Now, granted in the past I lied a lot, I came out and told everyone the truth and since then I have not lied (or tried my hardest not to lie) So I understand from time to time when I say something that you’d want to check up on it just to make sure cause that lingering feeling is there that maybe I’m lying again. However, after so many times that I’ve checked out and come clean you’d think that people would trust me a little more. So I’m done, I’m too tired to deal with any of this any more and if you’re one of those friends please either stop talking about me or leave me alone since we’re done. Thank you. This has been a public service announcement.

Yoshiki Foundation!So I was up in LA for about 3 days for a charity event benefiting The Grammy Foundation, Meals on Wheels, and the Make a Wish Foundation held by none other than Yoshiki of X Japan. It was his kick off party for his charity foundation that he started that day to benefit kids without music. I’m really happy I got to be a part of it and I feel blessed to have been able to share it with the people I shared it with. Dr. Sweet and his sister (+ the boyfriend of said sister, Casey D. Walmack!!) and Ms. Whirlwind of Disaster herself came with me to the benefit, we were in line from about 5am Thursday morning and didn’t get home until about 2:33am on Friday morning. That put Dr. Sweet and I at a total of 72 hours of being awake, people. We were DEAD tired. Besides the obvious line cutters, we had a really good time and I even saw some of the girls that were at the Miyavi concert that was a pleasant surprise!! We got to see X Japan in concert, took place in a new music video for a new song (that makes 4 X Japan music videos that I’m in) and I cried cause I’m a total nerd and being at that place made me happy ^^ After we were coming down the escalator and Dr. Sweet mentioned that it was too quiet and we needed to do our victory scream. So we did…little did we know that it would start a chain reaction and the whole area went nuts, cheering and screaming “We are!!! X!!! We are!!! X!!!!” and it was just all around epic. XD Good times ❤

We Are X!!!!On a side note, I gots me a new tattoo. Right above my (metaphorical) heart and yes, above the booby. I like to call it the “titty tissue”, copyright me!!! Bam! I’ve been wanting the tattoo forever and it was about time that I got it, this just seemed like the perfect opportunity to get it. Now if I could just get my Final Fantasy tattoo redone then I wouldn’t feel bad about neglecting it. Dr. Sweet promised to pressure me into getting it redone XD I seem to have a problem with getting things done I need done XDDDD Oh well! I’ll get it eventually. Anyways, I have to say that this is so far the most painful tattoo I’ve gotten and that it was completely worth it. X Japan has been my gateway into the world of Japanese music and culture and by association, my friends. I can’t thank them enough for that, a tattoo is the smallest way to say thanks. Anyways!!

h.NaotoSo at the charity event h.Naoto (a famous fashion designer) had a launch of his new line that he created with Yoshiki and I have to say that it was amazing!! I wish I had pictures to show you guys!! There were a few items here or there that I didn’t care for but for the most part the clothing was really bold, in your face, and just over all stylish. I have to say that my favorite shoes in the whole show were these high heels that were made to look like an X (I assume for “X Japan”) they were so exotic and yet simplistic that they shouted out at me “buy me! wear me!!” I needed them! XDDD I’m going to be on the look out for a lot of this particular fashion line, all of it was so amazing.

So…yes…that’s about it in a nutshell XD Fun times!!! Good days!!



God I hate stupid people...Stupid people, love ’em or hate ’em…me? I hate ’em like a boss. Case in point I love people that come up to me at work and tell me (not ask) that I am going to give them a 2nd race for free…then they stare at me bewildered while I’m laughing. I love questions like “Hi, I was wondering what the wait time was for Tuesday 3 weeks from now?” (True story) People wonder why I get so much enjoyment out of comments like these…Now, my mother likes to defend these people (why I’ll never know) by saying things like “Oh, they just mean is it typically busy on those days”  No, mother, they are not…if they were asking that question they would have said something to the effect of “What is the wait time like on Tuesdays?” or “How busy is it Tuesday?” not “3 weeks from now” that is just being stupid, I don’t care who you are. Sorry folks, contrary to popular belief I do not know everything and my crystal ball isn’t working right now.

Foreigners…I have a love hate relationship with them. Now am I racist? No. Far from it, but before you decide I am, let me explain. I love people of all cultures, I really do despite my “I hate people” general attitude. However, when I am working, and you come up to me speaking Iranian, Spanish, French, or what have you…and then get angry at me because I can’t understand you, that is YOUR bad, not mine. I don’t go to Mexico, France, or Iran expecting you to speak English and then scream at you because you don’t speak my language in your country. Now I don’t hate people that don’t speak English…every one has to start some where and there are a lot of languages that I don’t speak, but don’t get pissed at me because you’re in my country and I can’t understand your language. I also love it when people start talking about me in their language and don’t think I know they are talking about me…news flash, I know.

HELLZ YEAH!!!In other news, WHO IS WATCHING THE WORLD CUP?!?!?!? Well I am and that’s all that matters. Really, though, who is watching? Are you as freaking excited as I am? Ok, here are my thoughts…so America is doing a lot better than  thought. Despite all the ties and the win at the end, I’m actually still impressed with it. I honestly didn’t think we were going to make it into the 2nd round but here we are!! WHOO!! USA!!! USA!!! Also, Korea (South) is doing REALLY well, I’ve been really impressed with them so far and I’m cheering them on!! GO KOREA!! DAE HAN MIN GUK!!!!!!! A team I’m actually disappointed with is Italy…Mother Italia…..why? Why are you so bad this year? You used to be my favorite T.T Le sigh…oh well, let’s see what round two brings!!! WHOOP WHOOP!!

The God of the Drums himselfSo EXCITED!!! Next week The Yoshiki foundation (run by none other than Yoshiki of X Japan, my personal drumming idol) is holding a charity event that I’m going to. They are raising money for the Meals on Wheels foundation and the Grammy foundation and having a big ass party to start it off!! OW!! I’m seriously really excited about this event. There’s going to be music, fashion shows, raffles, all kinds of stuff. Believe it or not I’m really big into the “Meals on Wheels” foundation and all it does. If you guys want to know more about the foundation or you wanna help out please visit their website here!! I’m going there with my buddy Dr. Sweet, we got our invitations and we’re heading up there early to make sure we get front row to whatever is happening XD

One of the things Dr. sweet and I are srsly excited about at this charity event is the h.NAOTO fashion show that’s going to be held sometime that evening. h.NAOTO is one of our favorite designers for Japanese fashion and if I was smaller cause I’m just too much to handle, baby I’d wear them all the time. I’ve never been to a fashion show, but I was never really interested in American fashion anyway so this will be really exciting for us. Dr. Sweet and I have always wanted to watch a Japanese fashion show (yes it has actually come up in our conversations before) and the fact that this one is on American soil saves us some cash cause I am just too badass to visit Japan just yet.

To wrap things up, I am still playing video games, still playing drums, and am going to the D’espairsRay concert in August, which if you’re cool, I will see you at. Until my next post (whenever that may be cause a girl like me can’t be tied down by commitment. Bam)



Sorry to everyone who reads my posts. I apologize for leaving for so long. Dealing with my dad’s death has hit me in different ways and I just don’t know how to handle it sometimes. I took a little hiatus but I’ll try to keep posting regularly to keep you all updated on my rants to the world.

GOOD NEWS EVERYONE!!

Well, let’s start off with the good stuff! I’ve become much better with my drumming than I was a few months ago. I’m still enjoying it even tho I totally screwed up my back playing for about 7 – 8 hours with my crew. I’ve been taking pain meds and rubbing this aspirin cream into my muscles for a week or so now. It’s helping a bit but it’s not a solution to the problem. I either need to get me a back brace to keep my back straight, or they need to invent a set of Tama drums that are my size.

In other news:

HOLY SHIT IS THAT SOME MIYAVI!? YOU BET YOUR ASS THAT’S SOME MIYAVI!! LOOK AT THAT BITCH WIELD A GUITAR!! GONNA SELL OUT SOME MOTHER FUCKING CONCERTS WITH THAT GUITAR!!!

Yes folks, on June 10, 2010 I was present at the House of Blues concert for Miyavi himself. I have to say, I’ve never been disappointed at a concert of his. No matter what he always seems to blow me away. When ever he plays it’s like he channels a god into his fingertips and his hands move at speeds that my eyes can’t follow. Miyavi always seems to hold the audience in his hand and when he tells you to jump, you don’t even ask how high you just do it. My nephew recently got into Miyavi through the miracles of YouTube and when I heard this I bought him the tickets to the concert. He had no idea where he was going until he got there with my sister. My nephew is a little musician himself, and I thought it was really great how he could respect another musician despite the fact that they don’t speak the same language. For the first 20 minutes of the show all my nephew could do was stare at Miyavi in awe. Watching his fingers dance across the strings of his guitar, I could see my nephew’s eyes light up, and that made it all worth it.

This isn't them, obviously I met some nice girls in the line for Miyavi and it was really fun watching how excited they could get. I remember being young and having dreams of meeting some one I admired and respected. I had fun making sure they didn’t get beat up in the mild mosh pit and head banging along with them. Lovely ladies, it was a pleasure to meet you, I can’t wait to see you in line again!

After the concert I was walking with my nephew back to the car when I ran into some of my fans. As much as I love my little fangirls it really can be annoying to be in so much pain and being so tired and having to stop every two seconds to appease their fandom. Seriously one actually got on her knees and begged, the other asked me to sign her arm. All this my nephew witnessed. YOU ALL THINK I’M TALKING OUT OF MY ASS!! HA!! NOW I HAVE A WITNESS!! -Ahem- So to my fangirls, I love you, but please. When I start walking away and start looking really tired and start dragging my nephew behind me, I would like to go home. Thank you!

So about a week ago I got up for work and started to drive down the freeway for the 45 minute drive to my workplace when I started to feel kind of light headed. After a two second “I don’t feel so good” I started to vomit like my good pumpkin friend here. While I was driving. This has never happened to me before so I kind of started to flip out. Some how, some way I was able to pull to the side of the road and finish being sick. After a few shaky minutes I called my boss to let him know I wasn’t coming in, I was LITERALLY covered head to toe in vomit at the side of the freeway. I tried calling two other co-workers but I eventually had to call Mr. Bloo on his day off.  I was able to wake up my mom and she took care of me. Got me cleaned up and helped me clean my car. Moms’ are awesome. Very awesome. EVERYONE GO HUG YOUR MOM. NAOW. My boss seems to think that I got sick like that because of the stress of losing my dad, and honestly I agree with him. All kinds of crazy shit happen because of loss, who knows what else I might go through. Le Sigh.

SIDE NOTE!!!! Did you know that “Cougar” in French is “Puma” ? Do they even have cougars in France?

So…I’m sure you all have a friend, a friend that is amazing sometimes but kind of a bitch the other times. It’s usually the bitch parts that seem to get in the way of friendships with these people. I have one such friend, who is leaning very heavily in the bitch department recently. I don’t know what their deal is, I don’t know what I did or maybe they just up and decided they don’t like me. All I know is that they need to either live with it, talk to me about it, or walk the fuck out of my life. I’m tired of people thinking they can just say whatever to me and think it doesn’t hurt or that I’ll just put up with it. I’m just tired of it.

So that’s about it for now. Just living it day by day. Love you all.

And remember: A Dry Sponge, is a Happy Sponge



Life is fun. One would assume that a day off meant a “day off” but not for this little Raven. On Wednesday I woke up earlier than normal to pick up the house keeper, who is subbing for the other house keeper, and take her back to my mother’s house so she can…..house keep. Instead of doing something sane like trying to go back to bed, I decided that Thursday would be the day to sleep in and today would be the day for doing!! Yes! So I picked up my new glasses (after waiting 20 – 25 minutes for the guy to find them cause he ‘misplaced’ them), got an oil change (which turned into new windshield wipers, oil change, flush, brake fluid etc etc) The mechanic was amazed that my car was doing so well, on account of I haven’t had my car checked/oil changed in over 4 years. GO TOYOTA!!

After I went to Ralph’s (for all you in other states “Ralph’s” is also known as “Kroger” don’t ask me why, it just is) and apparently it was “Old people in cars that are too big for them” hour. Literally every car in the parking lot was either a large SUV or a truck and everyone of the people driving them were old women that were shorter than me. Mind you, I’m 5’1″ and -I- was finding it difficult to even figure out how -I- could climb into one of those trucks. This one old woman was just sitting in her giant ass truck blocking the entire entrance/exit for other cars, just sitting there driving the rest of us nuts trying to figure out what the fuck she was doing. I finally slammed my car into reverse and just found a parking spot across the way. I parked, got out of my car, and reached the market before the old woman even moved her truck up a few feet. SIIIIIIGH. Anyways! I got the grocery shopping done for the fam, and good times were had by all! I could finally rest!

JUST KIDDING!! Had you fooled didn’t I? No, once I got home I was about to settle in and play some Final Fantasy 13 when my mom tells me that the house keeper is going back home today…not later in the week like I originally thought. So, just as I’m leaving I get told that there’s an accident on the main route to the trolley station, gotta take the long way around =D So she’s dropped off fine and all that and when I got home I made dinner for the family, served it, and cleaned up after. Then, finally, I got some sleep.

Dawn of the day from Hell. So I get woken up early by my mother, my dad is sick, she’s sick, and I need to go to Walgreens to save them from the peril of being sick!! So at 6:30 in the morning this little Raven is flying to Walgreens to grab meds and things unspeakable. When I get back it’s the start of a day of horror, as I stayed up with my father to help him, made my mother breakfast and brought it to her in her room. My sister was at Disneyland so I had no help what-so-ever. Not her fault, not like she planned it, but jeebus man!! What a day to be gone! So I’d say 7 or 8 hours into my “taking care of dad” watch a friend of mine stopped by, we’ll call her Vin, and brought me ramune and my father some very fantastic Aloe drink. She made my freaking day I got to have a nice little break and we watched Sherlock Holmes together. Vin, I love you!

In other news, my ex has been contacting me lately. I’m not sure how I feel about this, I should be anger ridden and wishing death upon him, but I’m just so tired of it all. I’ve come to just read the messages and let it be, honestly. It takes so much less energy, and I need all the energy I can get since I really don’t have days off. All my days off are spent helping the family, you know? I’m just really tired. HUZZAH FOR EMO POSTS ABOUT SLEEP!!

Honestly that’s about all that’s happened in the past couple of days, besides the regular stupidity at work (why can’t I use two coupons together?!?! “Cause it says cannot combine with other offer” SO WHY CAN’T I USE IT?!), things have been going well. I’m going back to college this summer! More on that later, until then, go cut yourself emo kid.

LOOOOOVVEEE YOOOOU



et cetera